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nelson mandela bay's family lifestyle
author:
xandre van der berg
there are alternatives
photography:
zuko, lifegate photography
issue:
6, winter 2008
In Westbourne Road, Port Elizabeth, you will find Alternatives. The heart of Alternatives is to Care for her, bring her the Truth about her options and come alongside her with Compassion, no matter what her decision. Nancy* came to Alternatives in Westbourne Road, Port Elizabeth during 2007. She knew that she was about six months pregnant – she was desperate for some kind of help or support. “I did not know what to do about my pregnancy. I was alone and confused. My pregnancy was the result of an affair with a married man – as soon as he found out that I was pregnant, he broke off the relationship.” After a few counseling sessions Nancy decided not to abort the pregnancy, but to keep the baby. “During that time I was pregnant with more than the new life of my baby – I was pregnant with a new life of my own. In all the counseling I met God, His graciousness and unconditional love. I decided to trust Him for my own and my babies' future.” Then Nancy tested positive for HIV. “I was devastated. I was sad and angry. Most of all I was afraid that my baby will be born HIV positive.” Councilors supported Nancy, praying with her and helping her work through her emotions, confusion and fear. Then Sibo* was born – a beautiful baby girl and at six months “my daughter still tests negative for HIV. I am so grateful, this is God's miracle in my life.” Nancy's is just one of many stories of women helped by Alternatives, in a time when they had nowhere else to turn. “Alternatives is a ministry to women in a crisis pregnancy situation”, explains Bronwyn van Zyl. “We opened our doors in 1997 offering HCG Pregnancy Testing and Confidential Counseling for any woman in need, regardless of age, religion, marital status or background. Our aim is to provide a place of comfort and acceptance where women can come and know that there is someone who is willing to listen and care for them in their crisis situation.” Alternatives does not only provide pregnancy testing and counseling on the 'alternatives' that are available to women with a crisis pregnancy – “we also provide practical support”, says Eleanor Ware. “This begins with sourcing maternity and baby wear, equipment & products our clients may need. We offer workshops, talks and training on the Truth about Crisis Pregnancy, Abortion and Sexual Responsibility. We help individuals understand the reality and impact of the choices they make.” The practical support provided by Alternatives go much further, though. They also network and assist with adoption, when a mother should choose to have her baby, but not raise the child. In meeting with the graceful lady responsible for adoptions at Alternatives, I am challenged to reconsider my own feelings regarding adoption and especially cross-cultural adoption. “Are you aware of the first adoption we all read about”,she asks and I am uncertain of where she is taking me. “Moses! Go read that bit of the Bible again. There were no paperwork or court appearances, just a desperate Israelite mother who could not care for her baby, due to circumstances and an Egyptian woman who desperately wanted a child. God needed Moses to be born Israelite, to be raised as an Egyptian and eventually fulfill His purpose. This is still happening today.” Zanzi* was pregnant and in Johannesburg. She found Alternatives on the internet and “just knew” she had to come to Nelson Mandela Bay. “I was seriously considering aborting this child. I came to Alternatives, hoping they will assist me with this. I ended up having a profound encounter, giving birth to my baby and bringing joy to a white family who are now the most loving parents my little boy could ever have wanted. Because I fell pregnant, I now know God and I know that He has a purpose for the son I gave birth to. My life could have been devastated by the consistent choices I made – instead Alternatives helped me find insight and the destructive cycle is broken.” As I listen to Zanzi's story, I realize why so many women are touched through the work done by Alternatives – because those who volunteer, invest themselves and honestly believe in God's grace, His unconditional love and His purpose with every single life.
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